Have You Ever Felt Invisible?

When I was little, I always wanted to know all the rules so I could follow them implicitly! And this craziness has followed me to my adulthood!

I actually don't like rules. But when they're there there's nothing to do but comply!

When you follow the rules, people don't notice you because you fade into the routines that people take for granted. Like the sun rising and setting, it is taken for granted.

I was also shy and agreeable until I was in my thirties. I thought I had left all that invisibility behind me! But I realized this week, I hadn't!

As you read in a previous post, I started a new job last week. I had three days of training. Then on Monday I worked on the register. As I left I asked my manager when I was scheduled to work again. She told me she didn't have my schedule yet and not to worry, she would call me when I was working!

Well, it's now Thursday and there has been no call! I again feel invisible! I was not hired as a on-call employee. They never even said if my $7,000 register cashed out correctly. They don't let you count your own draw to see if it's right. Which to me, is an awful way to run a company!

So I've been posting resumes for other companies and am waiting to see how long it takes "my job" to call me. Then I will quit.

What would any of you do in this situation?

Does Everyone Feel Like This?

Does everyone get nervous on their first day of actual work (not orientation/training)?  I am a grown ass 54 year old, somewhat intelligent woman and I'm nervous going to work on a register.

Maybe it's because I understand the importance of doing a good job.  Or maybe it's the whole money thing, where I don't want to shortchange the company or the members.

Or maybe, like high school, I just want everyone to like me.  Is it really that simple?

During training I took notes.  When I came home I compiled them on a piece of paper.  It helps me remember them when I rewrite them.  Then I typed them up and printed them out to fit on small pieces of paper so I can keep them in my pocket.

My husband says I'm crazy.  They pay minimum wage.  But I say, who cares what they pay, I want to do the best I can do.  And who wants to look like an idiot when the job is supposedly simple?  I would rather be over prepared than under prepared.

I have always been a little neurotic and over do things.  

I don't understand why companies train the way they do.  They put you in a room all by yourself and make you watch the most awful, boring computer pages (not even movies).  There is no one to ask questions.  And they don't supply you with paper and a pen to take notes.

I actually wanted to take a picture of the cash register to memorize where all the keys were.

At one of my jobs we would put the cash register in "training mode" and have different scenarios happen so we would get hands on training before customers and mayhem came.  All jobs should train you hands on before meeting customers.

They should also give you cheat sheets of how to log on and off of your register and how to make money drops, frank checks, do voids and any other pertinent information you may need.

Today I will be thrown on my own register after 3 days of orientation and "training".  And a few hours of trying to watch others on their register.  Which was very hard to see with a carriage and employee in the way!  And with my own little cheat sheets that I hope I wrote down correctly.  Even though some of my notes looked a little sketchy.

After writing this blog post, I have come to the realization that it is my perfectionism that is making me nervous.  I DO NOT like to make mistakes.  Or especially look dumb in front of others.  I even took a summer school class in high school for typing, the summer before I had to take it that year so that I was prepared for class.

So today, after meditating this morning, I will go to work with the words of Deepak Chopra in my mind..."My actions are blissfully free from attachment of the outcome"!  I will do my best, as we say to our children, and "It is what it is"!

Let's hope it works.

Have an awesome day!

A Glass Of Wine And A Straw

Today I came home from work and found out my husband was working late. Good for us, bad for me!

I hadn't worked in over a year and have been sick with a fever and sore throat for two days! I just got a job and every night I've come home so far, my darling husband was there to cook and take care of me.

Well today there was no such luck! All the dishes and pans were dirty and all I wanted was to sit and have a glass of wine. Never mind that I was also starving. So my solution was to put my wine in a tall glass with a straw. Well wouldn't you know, I finished all the pans and dishes and the glass of wine.

So next time you think you need to make a choice, give it some thought and you just may come up with an awesome way to multitask!